Disasters

Terry mentioned something about Chernobyl last night, which resulted in me landing at this site: Chernobyl Ghost Town It takes you on a tour of a few odd miles through towns near the atomic plant. At the end of each page is a link to the next which brings you closer and closer to the eerie point of destruction. I clicked on each link with caution, expecting to see something I really didn't want to. In reality, I probably didn't want to see any of it. I am one of those (un)fortunate people who live with a dichotomous intrigue of the macabre, while being uncommonly squeamish.

I told Terry I would probably have a bad dream because of this tour. I did. I dreamt of pictures of radiated bodies, whatever those would look like. It affected me. It did in the same way visiting the Holocaust Museum did. I couldn't help but know that innumerable humans were killed, painfully, and that it would affect our civilization for generations to come.
Describing my dream will help no one. But, checking out this page might change your perspective a little bit. Take the time to read as well as look at the pictures; powerful images, equally powerful commentary.

I also dreamt, hopefully in a separate sequence, that once again, I was in New York. I was in a scarf shop for a good amount of time with a girl I've never seen. But I liked her. Also, (Tori I think this is because of our Dipping Dots experience) I dreamt that sherbet makes your boobs grow. The lady serving it said "makes the ta-tas grow big" in an eastern european accent and made big breast gestures with her arms and hands. I think it was a combination of tasting Tori's sherbet Dipping Dots, and our pregnant Chinese PhD temp in DCU wanting to take us all to Hooters for lunch before she goes out on maternity leave.

I made a couple of Mix CDs for Scott a little while ago. It was fun. Since he will be hanging out with his Ohio friends next week and not enslaved in the confines of Cardinal, he'll have plenty of time to check them out. I hope he likes them. I didn't put what songs were on them or who they are by. Is that not nice? I like the element of surprise.....

Still Monday!?

Holy goodness, it is still Monday. I'll be zonked out shortly but figured I'd jot a few thoughts down before I'm out.

• I realized a while ago that this time next year I could be getting ready to start State. I suppose I've literally come full circle. I started here when I left high school and headed for ASU in the mountains, then I wasted a couple of years doing nothing in Greenville. Now I'm back here and actually moving things along. Guess I just had to get out there and make a few mistakes until I got it right. I've learned a lot though; more than I ever would have had I just gone to school like a good girl and gotten a degree in decent time. I will forever be a student in the school of life.
  

I have more thoughts, I really do, but they are clouded by the seduction of sleep.
Will update soon.

Watch out Scarecrow!

You scored as Crow. You are the Crow. You are able to discover your own character and help others find themselves as well. You are very creative in the field you are in and tend to be the intelligent one of the bunch. Crow 100% Eagle 92% Dog 83% Horse 83% Deer 83% Dragon 75% Bull 75% Fox 75% Ram 75% Wolf 67% Stag 67% Bear 67% Salmon 50% Snake 50% Which animal totem best suits you? created with QuizFarm.com

The studious are never weary

Time to take a break from my studies to update. I have instruction from Jennifer-aka Tramp Bear, to make a list of the qualities I would like in a boyfriend, lover, husband, etc.
I also must share with the virtual world that my friend Scott-aka Stoner Bear, has finally caught up to the rest of us and created his own blog. Am currently taking bets on how long he will actually keep it alive. He is a scientific, analytical mind and I don't see writing as an activity that titillates him. Maybe he will surprise us all. He has also made a list of qualities his ideal girl would have. Should this interest you, his blog is located at http://www.scottibeer.blogspot.com

A girl can dream.....

• Will think I'm a smart cookie.
• Will think I'm a cute cookie.
• Will think I'm a funny cookie (little bit of ha-ha, little bit of strange).
• Will see me as strangely unique and like no one else, but will like me for it.
• Will hold my face when he kisses me.
• Will be happy spending a good part of Sunday loving over the paper.
• Will find my contest habit endearing.
• Will respect me.
• Will hear a certain song or two and think of me.
• Will be creative and open minded.
• Will make me feel safe, but not overprotected.
• Will hug me for no good reason except that he wants to.
• Will be honest and loyal.
• Will surprise me.
• Will like to read.
• Will understand that I just need to be alone sometimes.
• Will want to go on vacation with me.
• Won't have different rules for me, will make me a priority.
• Won't be cheap.
• Won't make fun of my fears of the dark, spiders, and buzzing insects.
• Will love me, one day, and every day after that.
  

So there.
I suppose I can be flexible, since I will expect him to be as well. Heh.
Make your list today. It's free, it passes the time, and it will give you something to look forward to.

All but the kitties....

Nihilist Bear


Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
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Life and the persuit of happyness

Just thought I'd log in and say hi. Never done this before.

Oui Oui

The sleeping pills I take have not only the effect of drunkenness but they produce vivid out there dreams.

Last night I was in Paris. I had really good hair and the bathroom in the hotel was stocked like its name was Sephora. I was with some high profile person. I mentioned that it would be nice to just drop everything and move there. She said "done", to go enjoy myself for a few days and everything would be taken care of for me. I went to a grocery store and I think Theran was with me. We were hungry and our tour guide got some pizza for us. I said "You won't find pizza like this anywhere else but Sicily and New York City." I then went to a checkout line and found a disposable camera for only four dollars! I only had 60 dollars for the whole trip, so I was excited. I talked with the cashier about double taxes, and the coinage came from two different automatic change machines.

Summer school is a lot of work. My pschology class is only 5 weeks long, so that will move really quickly. Geology is a lot of work, but I should do well since I took it at ECU.

A guy asked for my number a couple of weeks ago. This was the first time someone has asked for my number (only about the 3rd time altogether) that I wasn't creeped out by the guy. I was actually thinking how good looking he was, so it was really surprising. Jennifer and I had gone to IHOP downtown. She is some sort of magnet for crackies. One that had asked us for money on our way in was still hanging around my vehicle when we got ready to leave. So I asked the cashier guy to walk us out. He obliged. A little chit chat and at the end he said "Next time you come back I'll get your phone number?" I saved myself a trip and told him I'd give it to him right then.
I met an Eqyptian at the International House of Pancakes. I wonder what an Eqyptian pancake looks like anyhow.

Everyone who knows me knows I love a good contest. This site, Blingo, is backed by Google. It's a search engine. About every hour they give out prizes like Ipods, gift cards, and movie tickets randomly to people searching. They also have a friends program. For instance, when I won a free movie ticket, the person who referred me also won one. So, if you want to join, good luck!! :)

Bills, Pills, and Frills

I am not my normal self at this moment. I am a non-nauseated drunk. My mouth is hanging slightly open, not drooling mind you. If I move my arms any great distance, I don't know it until I've touched something other than the place where the arm was before I moved it. This surprises me, to have this arm I don't remember moving touch me in another place. It's all sort of astral.

Theran moved out of the Rochelle/Dycus household not long after she arrived because she found love on the information superhighway....exit red white and blue road. I worry for her safety back in dem theer wuds. But hopefully she will be ok.

Terry, Geoff's friend from school has taken her room. It is quite odd having another man here besides Tommy, but I feel ok enough to sleep well at night. Pills help too.
I have not been paid in over a month (it's on its way they say), but I have a hefty supply of pills. I won't name names, but they work. And I like them.

I go back to work Monday. It will be interesting how work and the pills get along. I'm ready to go back though.

I got a tattoo, a small one. It's something personal. It didn't make sense to the tattoo artist, and a bunch of other people. It's just something I wanted. It's a little solid black star about the size of an eraser tip on the inside of my left wrist. I didn't regret it for one second until I looked in a People or US magazine or something two weeks after the fact and saw about 3 celebrities with similar incarnations of my highly personal choice of body art.
Oh well. I felt unique for a few days anyhow.
I want to get another one, a bit bigger. Maybe I will draw it up myself or something.

Jennifer is on a life quest. I'm proud of her. She might be coming to stay here in Durham soon. Terry is on a life quest right now too, when he has found the answer, that room will be open for Jennifer to have.
I'm a selfish Virgo and like having my own room/bed. She knows this, and she probably wants her own room and bed as well. I am excited about her REALLY going out on her own, solo, and finding herself. She's had a lot of new experiences since her breakup. I know she wouldn't have been able to without breaking away from what had before been comfortable with as her life. Even talking to her she sounds like a different person. It's not in a forced way that I can tell, she seems excited about life and all the things she can do. She will do a lot of exciting things too. I know she'll be scared sometimes out on her own adventuring, but she knows it will make her stronger and smarter. Like a crazy anime character! Jennifonachoopikka!! Charge forces!! ARRGGHHHGHHH!!!!

Terry is suppossed to supposedly going to be maybe trying to do low carb with me. It worked for me about this time last year, I just didn't stick with it. At least I haven't gained it back....which is suprising.
It should be interesting.

I should get my Xterra back in like new condition around Tuesday. To rewind: on Cinco de Mayo a drunk driver hit me and TOOK OFF. I will highly hot. But no one (in my vehicle) got hurt, so that's the important thing. I've just been without a car for a week and a half.
I know that what hit me was a smaller truck, like an S-10 or mazda type truck. It happened no more than a mile from my house, so I figure maybe they live around here too. I keep my eye out for a smashed up front end on trucks that fit the profile. I'm not sure if it would even run, they hit a few signs before they hit me. But if it does, I'd spot it. I don't know if I could do anything about it, legally. Probably not because it would be hard to prove it was actually them. But I can pretend it's really them and shoot them mean looks.

For Simple Minds

In the spirit of Tori's Kitty Cannon website suggestion....knock yourself out!

After you've had you fill, let it sit a minute and don't kill anything and they will grow, it's gradual but watch for it.

Yank!

I had my wisdom teeth removed today. I was so nervous and anxious about it the past couple of weeks. I feel a whole lot better, worry wise and just in gereral. I had one that was in bad shape, and it probably made me feel bad. Theran went with me and drove me home. She took good care of me, I know she's a good friend, she saw some gross stuff come out of my mouth today. She went back with me as they sedated me which was really great, that part acutally scared me more than actually having my teeth out. I was worried I would have bad dreams or feel something. Apparently you're not really asleep, just really drugged up. I remember at one point sort of knowing what was going on, feeling them working the worst tooth. But there was no noise or pain. It went by so quick. Theran said when she came back when it was over, I said something like "I'm alive...I made it!" I have no memory of it!
The people who did the procedure were really great too, I am really in not much pain, and the oral surgeon called a few hours ago to make sure I was doing ok and see if I had any questions. I am going to write a nice letter to let them know what a good experience I've had. If anyone has to have any oral surgery done, I would highly recommend them.

I guess work and school are going ok, I think it will all be a lot better now that I've taken care of my teeth. I've signed up for a Geology and Psychology class for the summer. I'm so excited to get school over with. I think I'm going to try to apply for a different job within my company. It is closer the the field I want to eventually go in, in that it involves actually formatting and creating and editing docuements. I do a little of that now, but not to the extent I would at this position. I think I would get to use some different programs which would be great, I really want to get some experience.

Well not much more going on. I'm happy right now with my friends and family, I'm very glad I have people in my life that care about me. I care about them a great deal too.

In with the New, in with the Old.

'Bout time for an update eh?
Tremendous things have happened in the past month or so, all of which have so far turned into nothing. I guess the biggest thing was that for about a week I was convinced I would be moving to New Jersey. I thought I had an offer in the bag up there, and for close enough to what I wanted. But, in short, things fell through. At least I got to spend about 2 months there and finally see New York, for free.
Theran planned on going with me; we were going to be super roommates and go to the city every second we could. But alas, everything happens for a reason. I might have been pushed onto the track of an oncoming subway or murdered brutally in a dark alley. I'm over it now, I was more upset at why it fell through than that it did at all.
I should have a new computer in about a week (thank GOODNESS), a shiny new laptop. With the shiny new car and computer, I'm worried I'm putting myself into a hole. But they are things I need. Working on school is frustrating on this machine because it locks up every few minutes. It will be a wonder if I get this up without losing it eight times.
Being at Theran's is fun...we'll have more fun when we have extra money to go out with.
I'm only a few classes away from an Associate's. With some careful planning and hustling on the street corner, I could be done by the end of the year. But, the hustling will be hard, so it will probably be this time next year. Better late than not at all I suppose.
I'm excited looking at the Tech writing job prospects. It seems to be a well paying field, only bad part is a lot of it seems like contract work. That means no benefits or real job security. That's scary. But, I'll just have to see. I'm excited to get school over with and get into a CAREER.
Ok enough, nothing's really going on. Will be more prophetic later.

Shameful Confession of the Day:
I hate it when there are fast windshield wipers at stoplights.

And With the Wind...

I'm settling into my new vehicle nicely. I've had one, almost two incidents of road rage so far, and have felt HORRIBLE about them. In my old car if people were too close, I would hit my brakes kind of hard to make them back off (worked most of the time.) But I don't want to do that in my new one and mess the brakes up. Besides, it's a lot taller, no telling what crazy things it would do. I did it once and the tires squealed. Very scary. I must STOP. So, the new way I feel better about screwing with people too close to me when I'm already going 10 miles over the speed limit is to use the windshield wiper cleaner. It generally blows back onto their windshield as well, causing a muck. What's the worst that can happen, I'll have a really clean windshield, and hopefully they'll go around or back up. Fools.

School is eh. I've got a couple of punks in my english class who just know everything about everything. Hush up already. One sounds like he's memorized a bunch of crap and is just repeating it from memory. It's quite annoying. My online class is ending up being quite a bit of work that springs up on me. I work better last minute under pressure though, so that's usually how it goes. So far I've got an A in there. In english we don't have any grades yet, but I haven't missed any classes. A test in two weeks, so we'll see how I fare.

Work is ok. I wish wish wish we had overtime so I could make more money. With the car and this sort-of moving in at Theran's, it's going to be a stretch every month. I'll survive though, things usually seem to turn out ok. I will enjoy being at Theran's. Nights when Tommy works I get all wimpy and can't go to sleep for hours. Plus, we always just have a good time hanging out or just doing whatever. I'm not sure how long G will be there and that's kind of scary, but I will enjoy being there while I can. Eventually Theran and I will make it to Ikea so she can see for herself the glorious Scandinavian empire that it is....

Shameful Confession of the Day:
I will shortly retire to my room where I will play music and sing horribly and dance like a nut until I am exhausted.

Surprise!

Luckily I checked my online class page during lunch at work today. Our teacher had made an announcement reminding us that we had a couple of papers due by midnight. The assignment was kind of tucked away in an inconspicuous folder about writing assignments, and I just didn't see it! But, they were easy little papers, a personal history, and one about three important events from the year we were born. I picked Sandra Day O'Connor being name a Supreme Court Justice (it IS a Women and History class...needed that in there.) MTV being launched, and the official recognition of AIDS as a real and threatening disease.

A cousin of mine died of AIDS. He was Karen's brother. He would come from Durham to Carolina Beach to visit my mom and they would play scrabble together. He brought a picture album once of a Halloween party he went to. I remember seeing a man in chaps with his butt cheeks hanging out. They caught me going back to look at it a few times and they laughed. I was about 6. But that's how I know my mom was open minded and accepting, she LOVED him, and he would come visit and like I said, play scrabble and just hang out.

It feels good to be back in school again. I wrote my little papers and felt good about them. There's something wrong with me. Really. No, I like to write gosh darn it. I like for people to know what I think, and to communicate it in written form. That's ok. It's really ok. I'm not a bad person for it.

Shameful Confession of the Day:
I farted in the Controlled Document Room at work, when anyone could have walked right in behind me and 100% known it was me. I giggled at it and felt better.

Monday is OK

I am sort of glad to start a new week. Last week was a very unproductive one. The snow and ice on Wednesday sort of just started the nose dive for a lousy rest of the week for me. Nothing bad really happened, I just felt bad not being at work. Friday was ok with the snow but I had to take Tommy to the hospital. He is ok, he hurt his back and couldn't really do anything. They gave him some medicine and told him to take it easy for a week or so. At least it's nothing life threatening...

My car is gone. I might start to cry thinking about where it might be. I have a shiny new X-Terra in the driveway, but my maroon Shadow meant a lot. I cried a lot in that car, laughed a lot, made out a lot, thought WAY too much, and nearly got myself killed just a few times. I'm hoping my new vehicle will offer many happy memories in the future, but still thinking about the car makes me sad. It's almost like losing a pet.

Class was cancelled last week because of the weather, so I at least don't have that to feel guilty about. I do need to come up with a topic for my paper, by Thursday. Shakespeare, eh. Once I tried to write a paper about Shakespeare and the possibility that he didn't write his famous works, but Sir Francis Bacon did. I shan't do that again....

Shameful Confession of the Day:
I had caramel Hershey kisses tonight. Quite a few of them. I emotionally ate them and it felt good.

Free Association

I cannot say whether things will get better if we change; what I can say is they must change if they are to get better.
-G. C. Lichtenberg

'He means well' is useless unless he does well.
-Plautus

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
-Albert Einstein

I feel it.

Whether it's true or not, I feel smaller. I'm more motivated in the past few days about all of this, I'm not sure why. I really didn't stick to anything this past weekend, but I've been pretty good so far this week. Last night Tommy and I went to Johnny Carino's...Italian. Boy did I want some pasta and tiramisu. But, I got the Rosemary Lemon Chicken/Hold the pasta, double the vegetables instead. I had half and brought the rest to lunch. Everyone said it smelled so good and they wished they had some, so that made it taste even better. I'm usually the one smelling others' food wishing I had it. Like when they get back with Wendy's in a few minutes. I'm full though so hopefully it won't be too bad. Food is such a drug.

So to help all of this, today I got a 50 dollar gift card that works at Chili's, Maggiano's, Macaroni Grill, and a few other places I don't think we have around here. I got it for doing some work for another department. It was really a surprise, but I appreciate it. I didn't think it was that big of a deal, but apparently they did!
We have a temp starting next week. I really wish we had overtime instead. I'd wear it out...

Blasted Rats!

I go all the way to Wake Tech to get a replacement book, and they're slap out! There had to be 50 books there this time last week. I guess a lot of people waited until the last minute. More books should arrive tomorrow. That's what I get for not calling. I had a feeling I should have.

This online class is going to be tough, I think a lot more work than if it were a regular class. We've got 3 or 4 papers to write, and then all of the online message board correspondence as well. Hopefully I will learn a lot, that's the important thing. I would like to know about more women than Hillary Clinton and Oprah. I mean they're great, whoo hoo, go them, but lesser known influential women are great too....

S gets to go to San Diego for work for 2 weeks. I think that will help that he will be gone. Hopefully he won't ask me to watch his cat. I'd have to say no. That would be pointless, his cat might as well be him, and I'm fine until I see him.
Plus, if he keeps running by my office door grinning and waiting for me to be happy for him, I might just resent him. Eh, it's a long flight anyway, I won't be too jealous. I'd rather go back to NJ than there, quite honestly.

I have thought of one really positive thing about possibly moving in with TB. (yeah they're a disease!) For some reason when I'm there, I'm usually up by 9am, at the latest 10am. Maybe it's because there's usually some commotion going on and I get woken up, I dunno. But, it's good, because no matter what, if I'm at home in Durham, I just sleep all day. And I don't want to sleep my life away. (anymore) Naps are GREAT and I will never stop those...sleeping when you're really not supposed to is the best sleep of all. But, laying in bed from 2 AM until 2 PM does not a nap make. So, that's my positive, I will actually have more time to 'get a life' (reference previous post) should I move there. PLUS...there's a CAT. Hot Damn.

Non

I'm a bit stoic at the moment. Nothing terribly exciting is going on. I wish I could be at work right now, that's how hum drum it is. I usually would rather be at work around this time, when no one is there. I could get stuff done and not have to hear anyone. It just gets so...crowded. Is that awful of me? I do become antisocial sometimes...this moment is one of those times. A year and a half ago I probably just wouldn't have gone to work, and ended up losing my job. So, I guess I'm doing better.

So Geoff might move out of the party hole, and I might move in. I haven't thought about it too much because I guess it's been mentioned and mulled over before, and nothing really happens. He's quite famous for saying one thing is going to happen, and then the complete opposite occurring. Then there's whether or not T and B would really want me there...
I'm apparently a famously horrible roommate. But, I used to be a famously horrible lots of other things too, and I've improved, so who knows.

I think I'll like my British Lit class. There are some interesting characters. A woman sitting by me had escaped Liberian or Cambodian (forgive me for not remembering exactly) Civil War and now works as an infertility nurse. I've got a sparky little dude to my left who's in a band and thinks he's hot shit. There's a singing evangelical minister's daughter on the other side of the room (thank goodness) and a brother and sister team near her with chocolate milk skin. They seem nice. A guy sitting at their pod of desks seems suspiciously interested in everyone, asking questions. I think he was either stalling something or thinking we were all idiots in his own mind.
The teacher is kooky, so I like her. She's got the short hair and big mumu. Very little head and a lofty sort of body under the mumu. Bohemian to say the least. I dig it...

Tomorrow I have to take my history book back to the store. I paid the new price for it, but the first four pages are missing. I'd like my first four pages please.

I love...

Cinnabon Popcorn!
In my mouth!
Tastes so good.
Till it heads down south!

Cinnabon Popcorn!
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Cuts my bum
Like a garden plow!

Cinnabon Popcorn!
Try you some!
As good as sex
But won't make you come!

Is it a Dream or a Nightmare?

Night before last I dreamt that I was going somewhere...on an airplane. I appeared to have taken off fine, sitting smack in the middle of the parents from Growing Pains. Maggie and Steve was it? It was definitely Maggie...him I'm not so sure about.
Anyhow. She was to my right and made me feel calm. He was on my left and kept complaining about how my stuff was scattered everywhere.
There was an onboard movie...one of the Harry Potter films.
Suddenly we're back on the ground...guess it was just a practice run, we haven't gotten anywhere. We're switching passengers and this and that and I get a message and have to get off the plane. It leaves and in a few minutes there is smoke and commotion at the end of the runway. It hardly made it off the ground and it crashed. The Growing Pains parents were ok, although others did not make it.
I deduced that since I had been sitting in between them and they were alright, that I would have been fine.

Last night I dream (among other things I've already forgotten) that I'm going to a concert...with Theran I believe. It's.....an Eminem concert. I lose Theran somewhere along the way and end up in a balcony with a bunch of people I don't know. But, there's plenty of space and it's rather kooshy. Good thing, because as the crowd starts getting anxious for the concert to start, in comes Eminem and he sits down beside me. I notice that his arms aren't as big and cut as I thought they'd be. But he lays across my lap anyway and we become the best of friends, almost romantic to a point.
Another concert or a preconcert starts that involves groups of singing and dancing kids.
Eminem disappears, and someone arrives to decorate the balcony.

Get a Life

My boss says to me today "So Samantha, is this going to be your year?" I respond with a quick and confused "Huh?" to which she says with no hesitation (but not like she had rehearsed it) "Are you gonna move out, get a life?"

Ouch.

I guess she hears the look on my face and stops herself before going any further. I do a "Did you hear that, she said I have no life!" to someone else in the room to ease the tension. We all offer a laugh without seriousness and I eventually mumble something about moving out, that yeah, that would be good.

But for probably the next half an hour I think about getting a life. Or more so that people have the impression that I am without one. I guess we get comfortable, in our roles. Our everyday tasks, and weekly events. I'm slowly working towards goals. I'm not exactly where I want to be, but I'm not exactly terribly unhappy either. It's been worse.

If I am honest enough about how I think about other people, I would be able to say that I have thought "Oh, if they could just do that, things would probably be just a little better for them." I probably didn't take into consideration that they might be working on changing things, or might just be happy the way they are.

It was a lot easier before I realized that a lot of people probably think the same things about me. My internal perception of my LIFE is not what other people see; that has become painfully clear the past few days. Someone said to me yesterday "You seem as though you're carrying a burden." What the fuck? Is this like a napsack, can I toss it off my back when I realize it's too heavy?

Questions I need to ask myself are, do I think these external perceptions are true? Do I care if they're true? Do I care what they think? Should I care what they think/if they're right? Is this surge of seemingly skewed views about my life and personality a sign that I am indeed a lame sad duck?

If I weren't me, I would probably want to change something else for me too. I'd be another person looking at me thinking "I could not live like that, I could not accept that as my existence." Because, I've thought that about other people.

I'm comfortable though, and really ok. I'm more ok than I've been in a while and the changes that I do want to work on seem to be moving ahead. So, is it worse for me to be quasi-happy with a life other people see as mediocre, or to be depressed about a life I realize is a dump?

I choose quasi-happy with opportunity for growth.

Note to Self

Addendum:

• Do not take shit from boys. Stick to this like the way I used to stick to the shit they threw at me.

Broken Resolution Number One/Twin Jets

Well I missed work today. So much for that resolution. But, it's not like I'm playing hooky or anything. If anyone heard me speak they'd certainly want me to stay far away from them. I sound like I've been punched in the face a few times.
I went to the doctor. He seems to think it's allergies. I for one am not rooting for his diagnosis because that means this might be a normal thing, and I just can't live like that! It is wrong for me to beg for a sinus infection? I've never had allergies before...what on earth!?

So, I have this theory. I think every time I have a dream about two planes crashing, something horrid happens in the world. Shortly before September 11th I dreamed that two planes crashed into a train, one shortly after the other. A couple of weeks ago I dreamed about a light colored plane being chased by a dark blue or gray plane. But they both crashed behind Cracker Barrel. A tsunami has squat to do about airplanes, I know.
I did dream once about a very small plane crashing on Aviation Parkway, the road I take home from work. The most prominent memory of the dream is that there was a baby on board, and I kept coming across infant body parts as I looked for survivors.
A few days later, while I was at work, a similarly small plane had to make an emergency landing on Aviation Parkway. So far as I know no one was hurt and there were no babies on board.

There are horrible things happening in the world every second, I am aware of this. I am sure my dreams are not precursors to international history changing events. Still, I will take note in the future of dreams about parallel planes suddenly intersecting.

New Year

New Year's Resolutions:

• Stop calling people 'rednecks'
• Eat Less
• Write More
• Don't miss any class or work
• Don't be such a slob
• Be less shy
• Get a handle on the road rage Sammy....