I wish I could be the person who picks music for commercials, tv shows, movies, etc. Scoring-is that what they call it? I have been listening to a Matt & Kim song since at least early February, and now it's on some alcohol commercial. It's GREAT for them. But I felt like it was my little secret.
Music can affect me physically. I near tears. I hold back vomit. I tighten my fists and curl my toes. Certain songs provoke certain reactions...but if I really like a song, it produces at least one. A current and now over exposed song (thanks MTV Movie Awards) the Kings Of Leon rouser "Use Somebody" for example....there's this building up...a crescendo? I don't know the technical term but it's as if the drums are using all their might to climb a mountain, louder and louder the closer they get to the top. A feeling of joy wells inside my chest as the tension rises, a bubble in my throat. Will I cry, do I feel sick with accomplishment, climbing that musical mountain with the drummer? Almost, almost to everything.
Drums and horns have a special place in my ears. They just do it for me. Nearly any version of "Manteca"...forget about it. I'm mush. I want it to be just for me. "Did anyone else hear that? Maybe not, maybe it was just for my ears."
Music is good at being your dirty little secret until you hear it played in a place outside your car or earbuds and you see other people thinking they enjoy it. What!? They can't possibly understand it like me. I've had songs, nearly a whole careers of bands ruined in my head because of the way I saw other people experiencing the music.
It's a horrible, horrible way to be. But, I can't help it. I have loved the Killers and the Yeah Yeah Yeah's since their first little drops. When "All These Things That I've Done" became popular a few months ago, a little part of my musical soul died. The Yeah Yeah Yeah's got me through a shaky plane ride and while you would think the songs I listened to would bring up bad memories, they just make me feel strong like those drums and those belted out lyrics. "NO NO NO NO I'll HURRY WHEN I'M HOME, I'LL HURRY WHEN I'M HOME, NO NO NO NO!"
This is like trying to explain a dream. No one else is ever going to see it the way I have, and that's okay. But when Peter Bjorn and John's "Nothing to Worry About" BLOWS up, don't say I didn't warn you!
6.09.2009
10.04.2007
Movie I Must See
Into the Wild, adapted and directed by Sean Penn about Christopher McCandless and his solitary journey into the Alaskan wilderness. Bonus points for Emile Hirsche and his expressive eyebrows as McCandless.
"Into the Wild tells the tragic real-life story of Chris McCandless, a college grad from a wealthy family who set out to experience true adventure. In 1990, Chris donated his life savings to charity, abandoned his belongings and dropped out of sight. He changed his name to Alexander Supertramp, and for the next two years he backpacked through the United States, Mexico and Canada.
Along the way, he encountered people who were moved by his idealism…but Chris took his final journey alone. He ventured into the Alaskan wilderness, carrying very few supplies. For nearly four months, Chris called an abandoned bus his home and lived off of the land."
I have no doubt that it will be an emotion-provoking film and I'm excited to see it.
"Into the Wild tells the tragic real-life story of Chris McCandless, a college grad from a wealthy family who set out to experience true adventure. In 1990, Chris donated his life savings to charity, abandoned his belongings and dropped out of sight. He changed his name to Alexander Supertramp, and for the next two years he backpacked through the United States, Mexico and Canada.
Along the way, he encountered people who were moved by his idealism…but Chris took his final journey alone. He ventured into the Alaskan wilderness, carrying very few supplies. For nearly four months, Chris called an abandoned bus his home and lived off of the land."
I have no doubt that it will be an emotion-provoking film and I'm excited to see it.
5.26.2007
3.24.2007
3.12.2007
Well gosh, put me in charge.
It shouldn't be a hard job.
Amen...here, I'll do the job for free: If a soldier comes home wounded, they are to be given all necessary treatments, medications, surgeries, follow-up surgeries, and therapy, physical and psychological, free of charge for the rest of their lives. Give them at least the pay they were making while active, forever, and send their children to school. And, pie a la mode, every dang night of the week. There shouldn't be any question, this is just how it should be. Put it in the budget and don't buy what you can't afford.
Geren told employees at Walter Reed on Monday that "recent events focused on
shoddy facilities, failures of leadership," and added that the disability system
"has become a maze, overly bureaucratic, needlessly complex."
"A soldier who fights the battle shouldn't have to come home and fight the battle of bureaucracy," he said
Amen...here, I'll do the job for free: If a soldier comes home wounded, they are to be given all necessary treatments, medications, surgeries, follow-up surgeries, and therapy, physical and psychological, free of charge for the rest of their lives. Give them at least the pay they were making while active, forever, and send their children to school. And, pie a la mode, every dang night of the week. There shouldn't be any question, this is just how it should be. Put it in the budget and don't buy what you can't afford.
3.05.2007
Countdown
I effectively used the "count backwards from 100" technique to fall (back) asleep last night, or this morning, rather. Between 100 and 99 I tell myself that it's a silly idea, that it won't work. 99 to 98 I tell myself to just concentrate on breathing deep. 98 to 97, this still isn't going to work. 95 to 94, how are you ever going to fall asleep if you're still thinking, just stop thinking you fool!?
I remember 88-87. So, it works, as hard as I try to talk myself out of it.
My grandma slept 1) with a gun underneath her pillow and 2) with her jaw unhinged. I would find times when no one was looking and play with it (the gun, not her jaw). It was a small black thing that I was enamored with. She kept the bullets in the table beside her bed, the drawer spewed out a heavy mothball smell when I opened it. I never put the gun and the bullets together, I could figure out what bad things might happen. She didn't keep the thing under her pillow to make friends.
I wonder if she could tell that I had picked it up to inspect its tight curves and solid weight? I don't think I tried to pull the trigger even once, a foreshadowing of a fearsome nature that has followed me into adulthood.
I think about her gun and the thin skin on her fingers and if she would have shot a man standing at the foot of her bed, or me as I sneaked in for solace after a nightmare.
I too, sleep with my jaw unhinged. It's something I laughed at in my mind, seeing her laid back in her recliner, mouth open for any old thing to fly in. I thought it was just a thing older people did. And so, I'm cursed with the same unpleasant fashion of slumber, plus drool, because I believe I was unsympathetic.
I remember 88-87. So, it works, as hard as I try to talk myself out of it.
My grandma slept 1) with a gun underneath her pillow and 2) with her jaw unhinged. I would find times when no one was looking and play with it (the gun, not her jaw). It was a small black thing that I was enamored with. She kept the bullets in the table beside her bed, the drawer spewed out a heavy mothball smell when I opened it. I never put the gun and the bullets together, I could figure out what bad things might happen. She didn't keep the thing under her pillow to make friends.
I wonder if she could tell that I had picked it up to inspect its tight curves and solid weight? I don't think I tried to pull the trigger even once, a foreshadowing of a fearsome nature that has followed me into adulthood.
I think about her gun and the thin skin on her fingers and if she would have shot a man standing at the foot of her bed, or me as I sneaked in for solace after a nightmare.
I too, sleep with my jaw unhinged. It's something I laughed at in my mind, seeing her laid back in her recliner, mouth open for any old thing to fly in. I thought it was just a thing older people did. And so, I'm cursed with the same unpleasant fashion of slumber, plus drool, because I believe I was unsympathetic.
2.28.2007
Martius
In March, meet me at the Farmer’s Market
It’s where nothing’s ever broken, only bruised.
You can just cut through the sore spot
and eat around it.
We’ll talk over the juice of a peach
and shuffle heavy feet through corn husks, dry and crunchy
beneath our carelessness.
You’ll get a splinter handling a box of strawberries
and I’ll get a seed caught in my tooth.
A raspberry rumbles down from a table and onto
the shiny cement. It’s so ripe.
I see the bristles as it comes to a stop.
You step on it and keep going.
It’s where nothing’s ever broken, only bruised.
You can just cut through the sore spot
and eat around it.
We’ll talk over the juice of a peach
and shuffle heavy feet through corn husks, dry and crunchy
beneath our carelessness.
You’ll get a splinter handling a box of strawberries
and I’ll get a seed caught in my tooth.
A raspberry rumbles down from a table and onto
the shiny cement. It’s so ripe.
I see the bristles as it comes to a stop.
You step on it and keep going.
2.26.2007
2.13.2007
High Fidelity, Yeah, It's for the Anti-V-Day Crowd
Jack Black pushing out "Let's Get It On", one of the top five reasons that High Fidelity is one of my top five favorite movies. Pun intended. If you know it and you love it, you don't have pun stun right now.
Jack Black's version of "Let's Get It On" is on the soundtrack as well.
Happy Valentine's Day. Eating lots of chocolate I bought myself? Let's get it on. Shuga!
Jack Black's version of "Let's Get It On" is on the soundtrack as well.
Happy Valentine's Day. Eating lots of chocolate I bought myself? Let's get it on. Shuga!
2.12.2007
James Morrison Gives Me Something
"You Give Me Something" by 21 year old James Morrison was a free download on iTunes recently. I forgot about it until it played on a shuffle spin and it grew on me very quickly. This brit looks like Chris Martin of Coldplay, sings like warm honey, and has melodies echoing Stevie Wonder. The video for this song is super zzzz-worthy, but this live version is wonderful. Some wildly popular artists butcher their own songs live, but he proves here that his voice is rock steady and full of soul.
Go iTunes free download of the week, lovely pick.
Go iTunes free download of the week, lovely pick.
2.06.2007
My American Idol Experience
No, I didn't try out for American Idol, but an incident in third grade makes me think about what it would be like if I did.
We went to Chorus class a couple of times a week. We weren't automatically "in" the actual chorus, we had to try out with our 6 year old selves. At the time, those slap bracelets were
all the rage and somehow I had gotten one!
The same day of tryouts, I had my slap band taken away. That stung, and not in the slap band on your wrist sort of way. It stung inside. I didn't get many toys, and they took that one away. I was a little angry third grader by that time.
I did my tryout, and I didn't make it. I might have been the only one to not make it, I'm not sure. Somehow I was the last kid left in the room, and I started crying, more out of frustration that anything else.
The teacher asked me why I was upset. I stayed mum. "The chorus-you being tone deaf?" she asked. I shook my head. "You had your bracelet taken away?" I shook my head again. "Well I don't know what to tell you, you're tone deaf, and you're not getting the bracelet back, you aren't supposed to have toys in here all day."
I think I was most upset about having my slap band taken away. There is some deep symbolism there that I am too tired to get into right now. But,it was good to have someone say "you're not good enough." It makes you tough. And, I will be convinced for the rest of my life that I am tone deaf.
We went to Chorus class a couple of times a week. We weren't automatically "in" the actual chorus, we had to try out with our 6 year old selves. At the time, those slap bracelets were
all the rage and somehow I had gotten one!
The same day of tryouts, I had my slap band taken away. That stung, and not in the slap band on your wrist sort of way. It stung inside. I didn't get many toys, and they took that one away. I was a little angry third grader by that time.I did my tryout, and I didn't make it. I might have been the only one to not make it, I'm not sure. Somehow I was the last kid left in the room, and I started crying, more out of frustration that anything else.
The teacher asked me why I was upset. I stayed mum. "The chorus-you being tone deaf?" she asked. I shook my head. "You had your bracelet taken away?" I shook my head again. "Well I don't know what to tell you, you're tone deaf, and you're not getting the bracelet back, you aren't supposed to have toys in here all day."
I think I was most upset about having my slap band taken away. There is some deep symbolism there that I am too tired to get into right now. But,it was good to have someone say "you're not good enough." It makes you tough. And, I will be convinced for the rest of my life that I am tone deaf.
The 157 Mile High Club
This is concrete proof that really smart people can be crazy. An astronaut is accused of attempted murder through a series of strange events involving a love triangle...how sad. The most ironic part of the story is that the accused, Lisa Marie Nowak, has to wear a GPS monitor while she's free on $15,500 bond.
How many people have said that they want to be an astronaut when they grow up? A lot. How many people actually do it? Not so many. This woman was up there, out there, into the great beyond, and comes back to earth and gets loco over a man? Another astronaut? Maybe I should start watching the on-board camera feeds. Seems like there is more going on than floating space-ice cream and undulating water bubbles for zero gravity entertainment.
How many people have said that they want to be an astronaut when they grow up? A lot. How many people actually do it? Not so many. This woman was up there, out there, into the great beyond, and comes back to earth and gets loco over a man? Another astronaut? Maybe I should start watching the on-board camera feeds. Seems like there is more going on than floating space-ice cream and undulating water bubbles for zero gravity entertainment.
2.05.2007
No Conan for me
Oh well, my Super Bowl prediction wasn't quite on target, but I think I was pretty close. I predicted Colts, 23-18, and it ended up Colts 29-17. I think. Interesting considering how strong the Bears started off. Anyway, I didn't watch the darn thing. Although, it would have been nice to have some really good buffalo wings.
2.04.2007
Ghost Hunters Marathon on SciFi
Ghost Hunters in on all day today on the SciFi Channel. I like that these guys don't just get creepy feelings, they try to find out what could be causing things to happen. Some of my favorite episodes are the St. Augustine lighthouse, the Stanley (or the "Shining") Hotel, the Battleship North Carolina (in Wilmington!), and Eastern State Penitentiary.
My Superbowl Prediction
I'm feeling Colts, 23-18.
Why!? I don't know, but I like guessing games, so that's my guess. If I'm right, I'd like a guest appearance on Conan O'Brien to talk about my awesome predicting abilities. Then I'll be off to play the lottery, thank you very much.
Why!? I don't know, but I like guessing games, so that's my guess. If I'm right, I'd like a guest appearance on Conan O'Brien to talk about my awesome predicting abilities. Then I'll be off to play the lottery, thank you very much.
2.02.2007
You will always be the same
Always the same, from when, the day you were born? No one stays that innocent. Still, it's a beautiful sentiment.
1.30.2007
Presidents of the United States for President, '08
And the lovable nut in the sleeping bag, for VP. Kitty on the wall and Kitty on the chair--for First Kitties.
12.21.2006
When your elbow itches
scratch it. Don't walk up to someone and rub it against them. There's no good reason to scratch them with your itch.
A few weeks ago I saw a deer in the median on Davis Drive. It had been hit, apparently most violently in the head. As I approached it my eyes were drawn to the reddish pink flatness that was where the head used to be. It was not a mangled deer head, brains and eyes and bone scattered about. Someone had laid down a pink hearts bandana or scarf over the flattened head. It made me feel better, and it made me think about the juxtaposing art of guns with flowers exiting the barrels. Something potentially awful, with a nice afterthought.
I'm glad Incubus came out with a new album: have some lyrics for breafast, won't you?
Earth to Bella (Part I)
I'm okay to sink
I'm okay to sink
I'm okay to sink
Earth to Bella (Part II)
Earth to Bella,
this is a quiet emergency.
Earth to Bella,
there'’s so much more to get then wronged.
Earth to Bella,
you'’re treading water successfully.
But are you really?
Don'’t you want to see the deep?
It'’s not so hard.
Just forgive yourself & feel the water open in.
Paper Shoes
I fly/I soar/this I adore. & then like a locomotive
the sound of your sorrow comes. I'’m tired of the way it feels
I only apologized to you to make you feel better
But I think I'’ve outgrown that horsehair sweater.
I'’d rather be alone
you'’re '‘bout as reliable as paper shoes in bad weathers,
but pain will roll off like water on feather.
You'’d fly/you'd soar. But then like a locomotive
the sound of your sorrow comes. I'’m tired of the way it feels
I only apologized to you to make you feel better but I think I'’ve outgrown that horsehair sweater.
I'd rather be on my own
you'’re '‘bout as reliable as paper shoes in bad weathers,
but pain will roll off like water on feathers. I'’m tired of the way it feels
I only apologized to you to make you feel better
but I think I'’ve outgrown that horsehair sweater.
I'’d rather be alone
You'’re '‘bout as reliable as paper shoes in bad weathers
but pain will roll off like water on feathers.
A few weeks ago I saw a deer in the median on Davis Drive. It had been hit, apparently most violently in the head. As I approached it my eyes were drawn to the reddish pink flatness that was where the head used to be. It was not a mangled deer head, brains and eyes and bone scattered about. Someone had laid down a pink hearts bandana or scarf over the flattened head. It made me feel better, and it made me think about the juxtaposing art of guns with flowers exiting the barrels. Something potentially awful, with a nice afterthought.
I'm glad Incubus came out with a new album: have some lyrics for breafast, won't you?
Earth to Bella (Part I)
Earth to Bella
You think you've got it all figured in
Earth to Bella
Everything you know is wrong (Well, almost)
Earth to Bella
I see where you are not listening
I bear the burden of being the voice that let's you know
We all grow old
And before you swim you've gotta be okay to sink
Earth to Bella
The world can be an unfriendly place
So hold your head up
Do your best to save some face
It's not so hard
Just undo yourself and see your second sun
Ascend
I'm okay to sink
I'm okay to sink
I'm okay to sink
Earth to Bella (Part II)
Earth to Bella,
this is a quiet emergency.
Earth to Bella,
there'’s so much more to get then wronged.
Earth to Bella,
you'’re treading water successfully.
But are you really?
Don'’t you want to see the deep?
It'’s not so hard.
Just forgive yourself & feel the water open in.
Paper Shoes
I fly/I soar/this I adore. & then like a locomotive
the sound of your sorrow comes. I'’m tired of the way it feels
I only apologized to you to make you feel better
But I think I'’ve outgrown that horsehair sweater.
I'’d rather be alone
you'’re '‘bout as reliable as paper shoes in bad weathers,
but pain will roll off like water on feather.
You'’d fly/you'd soar. But then like a locomotive
the sound of your sorrow comes. I'’m tired of the way it feels
I only apologized to you to make you feel better but I think I'’ve outgrown that horsehair sweater.
I'd rather be on my own
you'’re '‘bout as reliable as paper shoes in bad weathers,
but pain will roll off like water on feathers. I'’m tired of the way it feels
I only apologized to you to make you feel better
but I think I'’ve outgrown that horsehair sweater.
I'’d rather be alone
You'’re '‘bout as reliable as paper shoes in bad weathers
but pain will roll off like water on feathers.
11.17.2006
Scent in a New York Minute
One of my favorite things about New York City is the smell. I can go through a lifetime of scents in a 60-second span of sidewalk. I have a sensitive emotional olfactory trigger and I highly believe in the power of pheremones. New York City is constantly secreting intoxicating pheremones from glands of steel and cement and culture. It's all of these things separately and at the same time: gasoline, three day old trash bags, cinnamon, grilled chicken, perfume that makes you want to melt, new shoes, hairspray, urine, wet dogs, old books, mopped floors that never dry, rubber, fish heads, musk, more musk, pastries, cigars, and lights.
You know, like the way a lightbulb smells if it heats up a bit of dust that has gathered on the surface . . .
You know, like the way a lightbulb smells if it heats up a bit of dust that has gathered on the surface . . .
11.15.2006
ilikecitylights
A few pictures, click for bigger views. It was raining pretty much the WHOLE time, so we didn't whip the camera out much. I will write more about the trip later.
I saw a cat in a pizza shop. I heart NY.
I saw a cat in a pizza shop. I heart NY.
Kryptonite
Who knew hotel elevators could be so stylish?
Our hotel
Our hotel entrance
Posing in NYC
ilikecitylights view from hotel room
When they say zero visibility at the Empire State Building, they mean it.
Practicing Knicks--they lost.
Linda after I whooped her in a racing game at ESPNZone.
Oh my gosh, we just met LeBron James!
Ahhh we just met LeBron James.
Linda in the Empire Clouds
Mad Magazine
Nanananananananana Batman!
DC Comics Characters
Mad Magazine
A view from the hotel
View of an ad for Secret on the side of the building, from the hotel.
Minibar--a soda was five dollars.
Gotham City mural at DC comics.
Heavenly Shower at the Westin
Heavenly beds and views and generally moden furniture at the Westin
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